Intentionally choosing to love oneself is a helpful tool that counters all the negative thoughts and self-doubt we encounter in our daily lives.
Despite the goodness all around us, human nature is to obsess over negativity. And how can we not? It’s so easy to get caught up in the chaos of the world. Between office drama, social media, and issues among family and friends, we are constantly bombarded with pessimism that can potentially cause harm to our mental and emotional health. After a while, this negativity festers into our hearts and minds, causing undesirable emotions to impact our thoughts and actions.
This is why self-love has become so important. Our lives are not perfect, but self-love teaches us to honor and respect the good and not so good characteristics that make us who we are. Loving your natural self despite what society says, choosing to highlight the good instead of the bad, and learning to prioritize your spiritual, emotional, and mental wellness are all healthy aspects of self-love.
Some people decide to end their relationships because they feel unlovable or unworthy of love. They would rather love themselves first, accepting all of their flaws before they learn how to really love or be loved by anyone else. While this is one method of self-love, consider this: dating and letting love in can teach you valuable lessons about how to love yourself.
We can all use a little more self-love, but it is important to first understand that self –love is not simply talking about a condition of feeling good. Self –love is more like having appreciation for yourself; and increasing it happens overtime, with mindful thoughts and actions you do every day. Therefore, it is very important to do things that support your spiritual, physical, and psychological state. Sometimes, engaging with people who love and care about you can teach you more about self –love than reading inspirational books.
Far too often, we emotionally beat ourselves up over insecurities and past mistakes, but the genuine love from a significant other, or from a potential love can completely change the perspective we have on ourselves. A partner who does not see the flaws you see in yourself, and instead loves you without the judgement you inflict on yourself, can significantly boost your self-love. You may be too self-conscious to realize how attractive you are when speaking, laughing, and interacting with other people, but your significant other sees the “you” that you can’t. That is the beauty in letting people into your life. They won’t focus on negative traits; they simply see you and appreciate who you are. A significant other can inadvertently show you your true value.
One of the most important things you can learn from other people is that they have the potential to teach you how to love the parts about you that you don’t necessarily like. We all have characteristics and secrets we would rather not share because we fear rejection and judgement. Nevertheless, being in a relationship and experiencing the love someone has for you can open your eyes to accepting your personal mistakes and insecurities. You both have flaws and you both still have the ability to love and appreciate one another. No one is perfect, and self-love encourages you to accept all parts of who you are. Being with someone who embraces you, flaws and all gives you the courage to completely be yourself—and there is nothing more empowering or self-loving than that.